"There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are messengers of overwhelming grief... and unspeakable love.” - Washington Irving

Sunday, February 21, 2010


Every morning Jhon wakes up a few minutes ahead of me. He gets up and goes straight to our darling Marcus' sanctuary. It doesn't fail, I hear him say, "Good morning baby!" His voice bleak yet faintly happy. Then he lights his candle and Papa Jaime's as well. It breaks my heart every time. He sounds like he is talking to our baby, just sleeping in his crib. Oh what could've been.

This has become our daily routine. This is how we cope. We watch his video everyday, we listen to his music. It gives us comfort.

At night before turning in, we let Marcus' candle die down. Then Jhon switches on his lamp and we say goodnight to our baby.

I miss our little Angel so much it hurts. It's one of those days. My heart feels extra heavy. I eat because I need to but the food is tasteless. The only thing we seem to have appetite for is sweets. Chemical imbalance is what Jhon and I call it.

Oh our baby Marcus...

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